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createthelove MARK GROVES @createthelove mentions
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It's also called growth. It's also called life. It's how transformation works. The path is never ...
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It's also called growth. It's also called life. It's how transformation works. The path is never linear... so stop needing it to be. 🏼 🕺🏽 #createthelove It's also called growth. It's also called life. It's how transformation works. The path is never linear... so stop needing it to be. 💃🏼 🕺🏽 #createthelove
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No matter how many masks we wear and how many filters we use, we wear our integrity in our energy. And ...
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No matter how many masks we wear and how many filters we use, we wear our integrity in our energy. And even further underneath our lies and secrets, is our true essence. • The more we get to know the deeper parts of ourselves, the more we'll be able to relate to everyone and their essence... because ... No matter how many masks we wear and how many filters we use, we wear our integrity in our energy. And even further underneath our lies and secrets, is our true essence.

The more we get to know the deeper parts of ourselves, the more we'll be able to relate to everyone and their essence... because we'll be wearing our soul outside our bodies. Souls recognize souls. Give birth to yours by getting to know and accepting all parts of yourself and your story. #createthelove
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Reactivity is wound memory. As in, a past memory of a situation which led to abandonment, rejection ...
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Reactivity is wound memory. As in, a past memory of a situation which led to abandonment, rejection and/or a sense of unworthiness is being triggered in the present moment. Essentially, our "wounding alarm system" is going off and saying, "we know where this has gone before." • The challenge ... Reactivity is wound memory. As in, a past memory of a situation which led to abandonment, rejection and/or a sense of unworthiness is being triggered in the present moment. Essentially, our "wounding alarm system" is going off and saying, "we know where this has gone before."

The challenge with this is that when we've experienced trauma (trauma being any pain or hurt, emotion and/or physical) we often become HYPER-sensitive to any potential hurt. So, what can happen, is that we can become very reactive to objectively simple things. Things and moments and words that don't actually threaten us.

If you tend to get defensive, withdraw, get angry, or just end things and run for the hills, your behaviour is likely being driven by hurt... and likely previous hurt, and sometimes hurt that has nothing to do with the non-threatening person who's trying to love us... we just can't see the love (or are terrified of it) through the fight/flight/freeze response we're in. Our subconscious takes control and creates similar relational situations, breakups, drama, fighting. And so on.

First off, welcome to the club. All of us humans are reactive in some way. And the work isn't to turn off the radar that triggers us, it's what we do with the trigger. We are responsible for how we react. Read that again. *We are responsible for how we react.*

Secondly, it is up to us to learn how our wounds get in the way of love and connection. It's always how "our stuff" plays with our "partner's stuff". (Friends and family and colleagues in here too). •
So where do we begin? Next time we get reactive, let's pause and get curious. Where do I feel this in my body? When is the first moment I remember feeling this way? And, in this moment, what would love do/choose? That's how we start. Awareness of the reactivity, and then choosing what we do with it.

It's not instantly fixed and healed... it takes practice and effort and trust to guide our hearts to safe love. It takes beautiful boundaries to preserve us, and it takes vulnerability to share and open ourselves up to love, which we often equate with pain and hurt. Let's change the story together, shall we? #createthelove
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All you can ask of yourself is to never ignore the lessons. Be committed to living at your highest ...
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All you can ask of yourself is to never ignore the lessons. Be committed to living at your highest level of knowledge... and just do the best you can. Be human. Struggle. Fall. Rise. Repeat. #createthelove All you can ask of yourself is to never ignore the lessons. Be committed to living at your highest level of knowledge... and just do the best you can. Be human. Struggle. Fall. Rise. Repeat. #createthelove
We are not locked by our past decisions. You owe no one a life commitment who you committed to with ...
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We are not locked by our past decisions. You owe no one a life commitment who you committed to with an awareness that lacked the ability to see the truth. • As time passes we gain knowledge, experience, and insights. We build strength, we learn, and sometimes we unlearn lifelong stories and ... We are not locked by our past decisions. You owe no one a life commitment who you committed to with an awareness that lacked the ability to see the truth.

As time passes we gain knowledge, experience, and insights. We build strength, we learn, and sometimes we unlearn lifelong stories and patterns. The death of a family member, health scares and something as simple as a book wakes us up to our destructive choices, behaviours, and even to the disruptive people around us.

It's interesting once this light comes on... Because you can't turn it off. You can't unlearn spiritual growth and a lightning bolt to your soul. In these moments we are literally being invited to rise up and become who we were always meant to be... Or continue down a path which is neither healthy nor happy.

Answer this call. Take the road that appears to be tougher... Because I promise that the work only appears hard. But that work - is a gift. And all those fears you have are really fears of staying the same.

You are meant to dream big, love big and live big. You are meant to live as someone with virtue and in the integrity of your heart. Be someone of great character and only invite those with great character to surround you. #createthelove
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It’s a life wasted to wish for a different life and/or to live someone else’s. This is your life. Your ...
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It’s a life wasted to wish for a different life and/or to live someone else’s. This is your life. Your heartbeat. Your canvas. Paint it with something only you can paint. Go out and #createthelove It’s a life wasted to wish for a different life and/or to live someone else’s. This is your life. Your heartbeat. Your canvas. Paint it with something only you can paint. Go out and #createthelove
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Ohhhhhh that struggle in the new-ness of relationships where we want to tell them how they've blown ...
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Ohhhhhh that struggle in the new-ness of relationships where we want to tell them how they've blown our fucking heart open... and also don't want to potentially scare them away. • The line between romantic and creepy seems delicate at best sometimes, doesn't it? Haha. Love you all. #createthelove ... Ohhhhhh that struggle in the new-ness of relationships where we want to tell them how they've blown our fucking heart open... and also don't want to potentially scare them away.

The line between romantic and creepy seems delicate at best sometimes, doesn't it? Haha. Love you all. #createthelove 📷: @connor.beaton
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The first book I ever read on the idea of existentialism and having a *purpose was Man’s Search for ...
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The first book I ever read on the idea of existentialism and having a *purpose was Man’s Search for Meaning by Victor Frankl. I had just ended my engagement and was wondering who I was. My whole life felt like a bit of a lie. I was lost and felt like I’d been lied to my whole life. Society told me everyone ... The first book I ever read on the idea of existentialism and having a *purpose was Man’s Search for Meaning by Victor Frankl. I had just ended my engagement and was wondering who I was. My whole life felt like a bit of a lie. I was lost and felt like I’d been lied to my whole life. Society told me everyone gets married and has kids and dies very much in love. Yet divorces happened all around me? I did a degree in a subject I hated. At a young age I abandoned the idea of being artist cause it “didn’t make money” so I wouldn’t be able to provide for a family.

I sat in a hotel room in New Brunswick and I was wide open. Sad, confused and searching. Reading that book changed my life… I had never thought about why I was on this planet. I hadn’t considered what mattered to me… like *truly mattered to me. I had thought I was living the life I wanted all along, but it seemed I was doing a lot of things subconsciously thinking it was what I was “supposed” to do. I was at a rock bottom… and let me tell you, any rock-bottom invites you to meet yourself… because you no longer have the energy to keep up the bullshit.

So I invite you to ask yourself, “Why am I here?” Our response when we’ve never considered this is, “But I’m just a regular human. I’m not here to do anything special”. I hear you. But let me tell you, maybe for the first time, that your life can be spent living in some avenue of purpose. You aren’t randomly here at this time. It took so many special moments to have you here, in this moment, reading this. Honour that. Honour the heartbeat you were given. Listen to that heart. Get to know that heart. Live from that heart. #createthelove
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This week for feature Friday I'm sharing @ioanniswritings - I loved his words about moving through ...
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This week for feature Friday I'm sharing @ioanniswritings - I loved his words about moving through intense challenges and how the choices we make can shift us from bystanders in our lives, to creators of the life we want. Read his post here: ⠀ ⠀ Taking responsibility doesn’t mean that we ... This week for feature Friday I'm sharing @ioanniswritings - I loved his words about moving through intense challenges and how the choices we make can shift us from bystanders in our lives, to creators of the life we want. Read his post here: ⠀

Taking responsibility doesn’t mean that we get to control the Fated. Taking responsibility means it’s how we respond to the Fated.⠀
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The difference between Free Will and Destiny.⠀
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So much of what gets to happen lies in the Power of the Divine. Something I’ve always struggled to accept. Something that I could just not swallow because of my need to control and my need to “know.” My utmost basic human need of needing to feel safe. I kept taking responsibility for things I now realize were not mine to take for. What was mine to take however, was the responsibility of how I would respond to it all. And that is essentially the only control that we do have. How we control ourselves and ourselves alone.⠀
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It’s human nature to need to feel safe and surrendering to the thought that not everything is in our hands is the scariest thing in the world. At any given moment, in any given circumstance where something comes our way, lives change and nothing is ever the same again.⠀
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But we are not hopeless. We are not without our faith. We are not without our strength and courage as human beings. We are not without our humanity.⠀
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How we choose to act and react to it all, how we decide to keep going and to keep living and loving through it all - that is what makes all the difference between a life that just seems to happen “to you” versus living by taking Life by the reins.⠀

Want to be featured next week? Share a post about what #createthelove means for you and tag me @createthelove in it - I can't wait to read them!
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A mother-effing badass. Bam. With Boundaries. Because an empath without boundaries is a recipe ...
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A mother-effing badass. Bam. With Boundaries. Because an empath without boundaries is a recipe for (self) destruction. Get some NOW - click the link in my bio for my boundaries webinar recording! #createthelove and words by @chelsealeifken A mother-effing badass. Bam. With Boundaries. Because an empath without boundaries is a recipe for (self) destruction. Get some NOW - click the link in my bio for my boundaries webinar recording! #createthelove 📷 and words by @chelsealeifken
If this isn’t love, then I just don’t know what is. #createthelove
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If this isn’t love, then I just don’t know what is. #createthelove If this isn’t love, then I just don’t know what is. #createthelove
It takes a lot of extra energy to pretend to be someone else. Imagine if you just became you? Imagine ...
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It takes a lot of extra energy to pretend to be someone else. Imagine if you just became you? Imagine if you let go of all the things you “have to” do and who you “need to be” and just were yourself?? That would be fucking amazing… And as you step into who you truly are, you invite everyone else to do ... It takes a lot of extra energy to pretend to be someone else. Imagine if you just became you? Imagine if you let go of all the things you “have to” do and who you “need to be” and just were yourself?? That would be fucking amazing… And as you step into who you truly are, you invite everyone else to do the same. #createthelove
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The key to your worth, is in your words and your choices. If you want to feel like you’re worthy, you ...
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The key to your worth, is in your words and your choices. If you want to feel like you’re worthy, you have to act like it. #createthelove The key to your worth, is in your words and your choices. If you want to feel like you’re worthy, you have to act like it. #createthelove
The greatest thing about recognizing that life is just patterns is that patterns are not who we are. ...
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The greatest thing about recognizing that life is just patterns is that patterns are not who we are. The challenges we experience in relationships and life will often be similar to the challenges of those before us… the “patterns” are inherited. If no one in our family has ever worked through ... The greatest thing about recognizing that life is just patterns is that patterns are not who we are. The challenges we experience in relationships and life will often be similar to the challenges of those before us… the “patterns” are inherited. If no one in our family has ever worked through trauma, grief, pain, anger, and/or addiction - where would we get the skills to do so?

This is why struggles are invitations to mastery. This is why what hurts is literally asking for our attention, our patience and our love. But no one in our family, up until this point, has taken the time to confront these “demons” or challenges. The pain of facing what we don’t do well is riddled with shame, shame we often inherited… So the first step is to face our pain and the truths of our past and the past of our family tree. It’s to write out what we don’t talk about. It’s about calling into reality what we’ve hidden and the bullshit we’ve tried to sweep under the carpet.

Our families are not required for this. This is for us to wake up to the truth. As we wake up and get boundaries and call shit out and heal our own stuff, it invites them to heal too. We change how we speak to them, or we stop speaking to them. Remember that your healing is your own. Never put your healing on the condition that you need an apology from someone else. It’s nice to get, sure, but you have the all the power needed for your healing. It’s your right, now take it. #createthelove
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In relationships there’s “our stuff” and there’s “their stuff” -  And how that stuff mixes together ...
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In relationships there’s “our stuff” and there’s “their stuff” -  And how that stuff mixes together creates chemistry, intimacy, drama, teamwork, conflict and all the magic and pain that is love. We are literally just like a couple of atoms colliding, aren’t we?! If you want to see how you’re ... In relationships there’s “our stuff” and there’s “their stuff” -  And how that stuff mixes together creates chemistry, intimacy, drama, teamwork, conflict and all the magic and pain that is love. We are literally just like a couple of atoms colliding, aren’t we?! If you want to see how you’re received by the world, look at the results you get in relationships.

The challenge with taking a peek at that is that often it will trigger shame, “But I don’t have anyone!” or “all my relationships end”. And while that may be true, not facing these truths and burying our head in the sand is EXACTLY WHAT WE DO IN THOSE RELATIONSHIPS. It’s just another part of the same pattern.

We have to be willing to ask the tough questions and face the tough truths. When our partner tells us they’re hurting, we don’t get to decide they aren’t. When our brother or work colleague tells us we’ve let them down, we need to pay attention. Of course, it requires separating what is the truth from what is manipulation. It requires owning what is “ours”, and what is “theirs”. Often in relationships our dynamic is to take responsibility for everything, or make the other responsible for everything (play the victim).

The way out? Learn you. Learn who you are, what you need, and where your blind spots and weaknesses are. Get to know your heart and your hurt. Do an honest audit of your life and your relational skills… and then step. The eff. Up. And then you’ll see others will have to do the same if they want to hang with you. #createthelove
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I have always found it so ironic that those who judge the most are usually the ones whose beliefs are ...
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I have always found it so ironic that those who judge the most are usually the ones whose beliefs are perceptionally the most extreme. I use the word 'perceptionally' because that's the outward appearance of their lives and choices... but underneath the veil of perfection and a squeaky ... I have always found it so ironic that those who judge the most are usually the ones whose beliefs are perceptionally the most extreme.
I use the word 'perceptionally' because that's the outward appearance of their lives and choices... but underneath the veil of perfection and a squeaky clean life, these people are usually living lives greatly out of integrity.

Why? Because being judgmental is a fear based behaviour. It's source is usually the fear that they'll be found out for their truths - so they point the finger at others. And/or their beliefs become so threatened that they need to cling to them even tighter.

So, if you judge others, look within. Put the mirror to your life and recognize that the judgment is really about choices you're making and fears you have but refuse to acknowledge.

If people judge you... seek to understand where it's coming from. Ask questions. If it's toxic and causing you to shrink and feel shame, let them know how their behaviour is affecting you.
If that doesn't work and/or it's not possible, remove yourself from their life. Ain't nobody got time for that shit.

Preserve yourself. Preserve your heart. Everybody fucks up, so be kind to yourself. And stop making the same mistakes, because after awhile they are actually choices, you just refuse to learn the lesson. #createthelove
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It's okay to not know what you want. It's okay to not know what that feeling means. It's okay to be wandering ...
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It's okay to not know what you want. It's okay to not know what that feeling means. It's okay to be wandering and curious. It's okay to not know what you want to do for work. It's okay to miss them... And not to as well. It's okay to not have it all figured out. It's okay to be whatever you want to be and ... It's okay to not know what you want. It's okay to not know what that feeling means. It's okay to be wandering and curious. It's okay to not know what you want to do for work. It's okay to miss them... And not to as well. It's okay to not have it all figured out. It's okay to be whatever you want to be and to feel however you want to feel. It's okay even (especially) if you're not okay.

We're all human and we all understand what it means to feel like we're just doing the best we can... And most of the time none of us have a clue... We're just winging it. And that's okay too.

Tag the people you want to know are loved simply for being themselves. #createthelove
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I had a friend ask me once, "How do I forget her?" To which I replied, "You don't. Because if you do you ...
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I had a friend ask me once, "How do I forget her?" To which I replied, "You don't. Because if you do you erase every moment you shared and all the love you had, you forget the lessons she taught you and how she contributes to helping you find the person you're meant to love." • It's okay for our exes ... I had a friend ask me once, "How do I forget her?" To which I replied, "You don't. Because if you do you erase every moment you shared and all the love you had, you forget the lessons she taught you and how she contributes to helping you find the person you're meant to love."

It's okay for our exes to cross our minds and feel them in our hearts. I look at every past relationship as having a space in my heart that is reserved for what they taught me. At one point they were exactly what I wanted, and whether it was my choice or not, they became part of my past and taught me what I want more and less of out of a relationship partner in the future.

Our pasts, if examined with eager eyes, unlocks the mysteries to how we love and also provides the energy to say,"Never again!" And also,"I'll have some more of that please!" They also taught us what we didn't do so well and how we need to show up better.

I would only be able to recognize @beingisbeautiful who gets every space of my heart, because of my life experiences. Without my past, she would be a stranger, and I wouldn't know how to love her in the way I do and plan to continue getting better at. #createthelove
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You gotta choose. #createthelove
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You gotta choose. #createthelove You gotta choose. #createthelove
The moment I don't know what's going to happen is the moment I get unbelievably excited... and terrified. ...
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The moment I don't know what's going to happen is the moment I get unbelievably excited... and terrified. I used to be so fearful of the unknown, and a lot of us get stuck in these patterns of familiarity... we drive the same way to work, eat the same food... we live a life that is very predictable. • There's ... The moment I don't know what's going to happen is the moment I get unbelievably excited... and terrified. I used to be so fearful of the unknown, and a lot of us get stuck in these patterns of familiarity... we drive the same way to work, eat the same food... we live a life that is very predictable.

There's nothing wrong with predictability, but if you think about it, any situation that you basically know the outcome of, is a moment already lived. There's no variety, no curiosity and exploration.

This is why relationships get stuck, and even why single people stay single... Curiosity and growth cause shifts in us. They cause us to change and expand, which is what we want... kinda. Because we also don't want to face the fear that's necessary for the experience. We don't want our lives and relationships to change, because then they become uncertain, so we live the same effing day, and have the same convos and eat the same goddamn piece of toast (avocado toast for the win though... #amiright ?!?).

Dive into your curiosity. What adventures have you delayed? How have you abandoned and/or paused your growth to keep your life safe? To avoid the terrifying reality of change?

We can't fight the transformation that nature demands... do you see that you are also part of nature? Evolve. Expand. Love. Happy day to you 😘 #createthelove
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Straight up. <span class="emoji emoji1f525"></span> <span class="emoji emoji26fa"></span>️ <span class="emoji emoji2615"></span>️ ⛰ #createthelove
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Straight up. ️ ⛰ #createthelove Straight up. 🔥 ⛺️ ☕️ ⛰ #createthelove
Add to the good things. And then let the pile of good things grow. I like this idea. #createthelove
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Add to the good things. And then let the pile of good things grow. I like this idea. #createthelove Add to the good things. And then let the pile of good things grow. I like this idea. #createthelove
We choose to see the things in others that support our stories… the things that are evidence of our ...
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We choose to see the things in others that support our stories… the things that are evidence of our beliefs about the world and ourselves…In psychology we call it a “confirmation bias” and in spirituality we would say that everybody holds a mirror to the things we love and don’t love about ourselves. • If ... We choose to see the things in others that support our stories… the things that are evidence of our beliefs about the world and ourselves…In psychology we call it a “confirmation bias” and in spirituality we would say that everybody holds a mirror to the things we love and don’t love about ourselves.

If we don’t believe that we’re enough, we’ll not only choose people that reinforce that belief about ourselves, but even if we have a pretty great partner/friend, we’ll find all of the things & behaviours in them that support our deep sense of unworthiness. You might hear them say things like, “Nothing I ever do is enough.” The irony is we blame them. We curse them for how they “make” us feel.

But I invite you to go a step further. I invite you to look inside and ask yourself two things:

1) Am I only finding the things that support my story? Despite ALLLLLL the good things they do, am I’m picking the things that support the story that I’m not loveable and/or worthy? That they’re not a great partner/friend?

And 2) If this person truly can’t show up for me, and they’re incapable of giving me the love I need and am willing to give, what do I have to believe about myself in order for them to stay in my life?

By choosing you in those moment YOU give yourself the love you so desperate crave. Mind. Blown. 💥

Here’s where the magic is...and it can be painful magic, but it’s still magic. What we believe about ourselves will be reflected in the type of life we choose, the cars we drive, and the people who surround us. If we want to believe we’re worthy of amazing and great love, & ALSO believe that we are enough, who in our life makes that belief impossible?!

The way out is through our own choices. Begin to use this as your guiding question: If I believe that I’m enough, what would I do in *this* situation? What words would I speak? Who would I keep in my life? What would my relationships be like with food, alcohol, sex, drugs…money. Name it, they’re all a numbing technique to try to shortcut the work that’s required to build a life that makes you feel beautiful. But nothing can buy that feeling, you have to create it. #createthelove
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I was the first follower of @iamhertribe as I was blessed to be there for the birth of Danielle’s amazing ...
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I was the first follower of @iamhertribe as I was blessed to be there for the birth of Danielle’s amazing movement. If you don’t follow this gem, it’s time to start. Her writing hits you in the soul and her purpose is to serve and inspire. Check her words out here: "it was almost four years ago that ... I was the first follower of @iamhertribe as I was blessed to be there for the birth of Danielle’s amazing movement. If you don’t follow this gem, it’s time to start. Her writing hits you in the soul and her purpose is to serve and inspire. Check her words out here: "it was almost four years ago that i was sitting on top of the Rockefeller center waiting for the moon to rise on the city. i sat there for over four hours in the same perfect spot, awaiting the sunset, writing in my journal about what was next for that season of my life.

i had just left my cushy corporate job. i flew out to NYC to meet my friend @createthelove, and i had no clue what was next for me.

i will always carry that night, that feeling, close to my heart, for it was the first time i ever felt fully, completely alive. i had just created @iamhertribe, and even though i didn't know what the next steps looked like, i knew i was in an open space where anything was possible.

from my first followers, Mark + my sweet mom, to now, over 170,000 humans stretching from across the globe. this community has pushed me, broken me, mended me, loved me, and saved me.
 
i am forever grateful for everyone that has ever believed in the fire within me who knows she will change the world—you have taught me that this life, this work, isn't meant to be taken on alone. connection is the key to everything." Wishing you all a beautiful weekend ahead! If yo want to be featured next week, write about what #createthelove means to you and tag me in your post!
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Pay attention to this: The quality of your relationships (and your life) will depend on your ability ...
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Pay attention to this: The quality of your relationships (and your life) will depend on your ability to communicate well. The depth of your love and your partnership will be directly correlated to how you process your emotions, the emotions of others, and the ability to build connection ... Pay attention to this:
The quality of your relationships (and your life) will depend on your ability to communicate well. The depth of your love and your partnership will be directly correlated to how you process your emotions, the emotions of others, and the ability to build connection and intimacy where you once had disconnection. #createthelove
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Yaaaaaaas. #createthelove
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Yaaaaaaas. #createthelove Yaaaaaaas. #createthelove
Your feelings are your fire. Your passion is your fuel. Your pain is your motivator. Your anger transforms ...
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Your feelings are your fire. Your passion is your fuel. Your pain is your motivator. Your anger transforms worlds. Your forgiveness and openness are a strength and not a weakness. • The people who try to silence you, are the ones who fear you most. The people who fan your flames, know they’re ... Your feelings are your fire. Your passion is your fuel. Your pain is your motivator. Your anger transforms worlds. Your forgiveness and openness are a strength and not a weakness.

The people who try to silence you, are the ones who fear you most. The people who fan your flames, know they’re likely to get burnt. Don’t silence your heart and shrink to keep others safe. Invite them to rise and meet you. #createthelove
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Feeling heard and understood rank as some of the top human needs in intimacy... but at times that ...
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Feeling heard and understood rank as some of the top human needs in intimacy... but at times that can be quite a tall task for our partners to always provide, especially because we often don't even understand ourselves and our own emotions. • This is why, to me, presence and a willingness ... Feeling heard and understood rank as some of the top human needs in intimacy... but at times that can be quite a tall task for our partners to always provide, especially because we often don't even understand ourselves and our own emotions.

This is why, to me, presence and a willingness to listen and hold that space, are such powerful ways to communicate love.

Sometimes, in the midst of me trying to process myself and my emotions, the patience and support of a loving heart becomes the ingredient that helps crack the code. #createthelove
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We all know the saying “you have to believe it to see it”... but the truth is actually the opposite, ...
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We all know the saying “you have to believe it to see it”... but the truth is actually the opposite, you have to see it to prove to yourself that the belief exists. If the people/choices in our lives have us feeling like shit, they will reinforce a belief of “I’m not worthy of more”. • So, to change ... We all know the saying “you have to believe it to see it”... but the truth is actually the opposite, you have to see it to prove to yourself that the belief exists. If the people/choices in our lives have us feeling like shit, they will reinforce a belief of “I’m not worthy of more”.

So, to change your beliefs (and your life) make an audit of the parts of your life that don’t make you feel so good about yourself. It’s not always about removing people… sometimes it’s about just changing what we allow. Be the curator of your life and your own beliefs, don’t let destructive beliefs choose for you… change them. They are yours afterall. #createthelove
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It’s time to wake up and start respecting yourself enough to apologize for all of the pain your mind ...
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It’s time to wake up and start respecting yourself enough to apologize for all of the pain your mind has put your heart through (and vice versa). When you own it, and apologize for it, you can change. You can’t get where you need to go if you don’t acknowledge where you’ve come from and where you ... It’s time to wake up and start respecting yourself enough to apologize for all of the pain your mind has put your heart through (and vice versa). When you own it, and apologize for it, you can change. You can’t get where you need to go if you don’t acknowledge where you’ve come from and where you actually are at. #createthelove
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It's time to choose the shit we want and to get rid of the things we don't. Break out of your own comfort ...
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It's time to choose the shit we want and to get rid of the things we don't. Break out of your own comfort and choose to live the life you want and not what you’re used to. You have to choose your way to the life you want. #createthelove It's time to choose the shit we want and to get rid of the things we don't. Break out of your own comfort and choose to live the life you want and not what you’re used to. You have to choose your way to the life you want. #createthelove
If you don’t honour your word, your word means nothing. If you don’t do what you say you’ll do, you’re ...
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If you don’t honour your word, your word means nothing. If you don’t do what you say you’ll do, you’re full of shit and your word means nothing. The message you send to those you make promises to is that they aren’t important enough to be honest with and make changes for. The message you send to ... If you don’t honour your word, your word means nothing. If you don’t do what you say you’ll do, you’re full of shit and your word means nothing. The message you send to those you make promises to is that they aren’t important enough to be honest with and make changes for. The message you send to yourself is that you can’t trust yourself or your words, and that you’re not worthy of living up to what you say.

Kinda heavy, right? Good. Don’t run from the heaviness. Stay here. Read these words. Feel the pain of what it means to be out of integrity… and then use that pain to change. Whether you feel it or not, the pain exists. So, let’s deal with it. •
The first step is clearing and apologizing with the people (including yourself) who you haven’t kept your word with. The second step is expressing and committing to changes you’re willing to make. Third, make them. And then feel what it’s like to be a human of integrity. Whose word matches their actions. Feel what it’s like to be free. #createthelove
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Let’s be the best version of ourselves, in every moment, forever. #createthelove
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Let’s be the best version of ourselves, in every moment, forever. #createthelove Let’s be the best version of ourselves, in every moment, forever. #createthelove
Fact. Stop fighting for people who don't fight for you. Stop waiting for other people to choose you ...
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Fact. Stop fighting for people who don't fight for you. Stop waiting for other people to choose you when you can choose yourself. #createthelove Fact. Stop fighting for people who don't fight for you. Stop waiting for other people to choose you when you can choose yourself. #createthelove
It really is one or the other, isn’t it? The greatest way to grow is to surround yourself with people ...
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It really is one or the other, isn’t it? The greatest way to grow is to surround yourself with people who are where you want to be… so, ask yourself: • Who do you want to become? What do you want to achieve? How do you want to feel? And then go find those people and just show up and listen and be present ... It really is one or the other, isn’t it? The greatest way to grow is to surround yourself with people who are where you want to be… so, ask yourself:

Who do you want to become? What do you want to achieve? How do you want to feel? And then go find those people and just show up and listen and be present and learn. #createthelove
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In a study where they took people who had “bad luck” and taught them what lucky people do, they became ...
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In a study where they took people who had “bad luck” and taught them what lucky people do, they became lucky. To live the way a lucky person does is to live with your eyes wide open. It’s to see possibility. It’s to be open to miracles. It’s to drive different ways to work. It’s having coffee in different ... In a study where they took people who had “bad luck” and taught them what lucky people do, they became lucky. To live the way a lucky person does is to live with your eyes wide open. It’s to see possibility. It’s to be open to miracles. It’s to drive different ways to work. It’s having coffee in different places. It’s doing things differently and being open to life working out… ironically that’s when we see other possibilities and opportunities, because we believe it’s possible. #createthelove
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One thing I know for sure. #createthelove
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One thing I know for sure. #createthelove One thing I know for sure. #createthelove
Our relationship education begins at home… so, unless you went and took a class on relationships, ...
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Our relationship education begins at home… so, unless you went and took a class on relationships, how would you know how to successfully be in one? How would you know how to successfully navigate conflict if no one in your home navigated it well? • The limits we hit in love will usually be the ... Our relationship education begins at home… so, unless you went and took a class on relationships, how would you know how to successfully be in one? How would you know how to successfully navigate conflict if no one in your home navigated it well?

The limits we hit in love will usually be the hereditary limits our family tree has always hit, because no one has done it differently. No one has loved deeper and gone deeper so as to teach the next generation.

It’s your responsibility to learn your limits. It’s on you to find the edge of how you love and to learn what you need to do to go deeper into your own heart - so you can do that with another. Remember, if you don’t know the love that’s on the other side of conflict, you don’t know what exists and what is possible when disagreement actually allows you and your partner to learn each other and get to another level… when we do that, we take our family tree and plant roots that fertilize themselves. #createthelove
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I love what @ilya_sandoval has to say here because life is about learning. We learn to accept, we ...
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I love what @ilya_sandoval has to say here because life is about learning. We learn to accept, we learn to move on, we learn to forgive, we learn to love. We learn to create the future we want. Here are her beautiful words: "And then you learn.... To look into the mirror to see your soul and your ... I love what @ilya_sandoval has to say here because life is about learning. We learn to accept, we learn to move on, we learn to forgive, we learn to love. We learn to create the future we want. Here are her beautiful words: "And then you learn.... To look into the mirror to see your soul and your heart, and not your wrinkles, your real and imaginary imperfections 🔅
You learn to touch your skin in the perfect way that it's meant to be touched.
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You learn to discover the music of the silence when your only presence fills your home with love.
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You learn to talk to yourself patiently about your lost dreams and future goals
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You learn to love your laugh, your changing moods, you over obsesses mind, and you need to scape the world once in a while.
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You learn to be thankful for what it was, for what it is , and learn to eagerly enjoy the waiting for what it will be.
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And once you learn all that, you understand that your heart will always be filled with love, no matter what"

Want to be my next feature? Write a post about how you #createthelove and tag @createthelove in it. I love learning from all of you and can't wait to read and share what you write!
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Great love is patient... Not perfect. Great partners won't always know the right thing to say and ...
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Great love is patient... Not perfect. Great partners won't always know the right thing to say and they won't always know exactly what to do... But they'll try. And that's the part that matters... The effort. The choice to stay committed to helping us see our beauty and our heart even when we ... Great love is patient... Not perfect. Great partners won't always know the right thing to say and they won't always know exactly what to do... But they'll try. And that's the part that matters... The effort. The choice to stay committed to helping us see our beauty and our heart even when we don't have the tools to do so ourselves.

Love is challenging. Learning to be a great partner is too. Give yourself the space to make mistakes, grow, and become. And give your partner that same freedom to be. Great love grows from there. #createthelove
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Courage is about leaning into what we don’t know. It’s about stepping towards the edge of our story. ...
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Courage is about leaning into what we don’t know. It’s about stepping towards the edge of our story. We spend so much time living in what we think we should do and how we think we should be, it’s courage (and vulnerability) that are the way out. • Comfortable is great. It’s good for us… to a point. ... Courage is about leaning into what we don’t know. It’s about stepping towards the edge of our story. We spend so much time living in what we think we should do and how we think we should be, it’s courage (and vulnerability) that are the way out.

Comfortable is great. It’s good for us… to a point. Because there is “comfortable” that is our foundation - that has us feel safe and grounded so we can grow, and there is “comfortable” that is about taking people, things, and life for granted. There is comfortable that is incredibly painful too. Familiar, and sometimes shitty, it’s still comfortable.

Rejoin you. Come back to your heart and your story as you want it. Have a love affair with the unknown. Create a comfortable that is foundational. Lean into your own story and your own edge. Live with courage, and honour your fear. Fear doesn’t disappear, we just decide that it’s done choosing for us. #createthelove
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You can always change the story. Start now, in this moment, to cultivate the life you truly want, ...
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You can always change the story. Start now, in this moment, to cultivate the life you truly want, who you want to be, and what you want to live for. #createthelove You can always change the story. Start now, in this moment, to cultivate the life you truly want, who you want to be, and what you want to live for. #createthelove
To choose something or someone is the ultimate act of power, and also the ultimate act of surrender. When we choose we decide that we’re ready to meet fate, because fate doesn’t work for you if you don’t choose your way towards it. #createthelove To choose something or someone is the ultimate act of power, and also the ultimate act of surrender. When we choose we decide that we’re ready to meet fate, because fate doesn’t work for you if you don’t choose your way towards it. #createthelove
Burritos are a love language. #createthelove
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Burritos are a love language. #createthelove Burritos are a love language. #createthelove
Want to learn how to pick better men/women? What to change your dating patterns and recognize red ...
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Want to learn how to pick better men/women? What to change your dating patterns and recognize red flags?? Picking a great partner is a skill, and so is dating. Click on the link in my bio to register NOW for my new webinar... Dating 101. If you can't make the live webinar, you'll get a copy of the ... Want to learn how to pick better men/women? What to change your dating patterns and recognize red flags?? Picking a great partner is a skill, and so is dating. Click on the link in my bio to register NOW for my new webinar... Dating 101. If you can't make the live webinar, you'll get a copy of the recording for life! #createthelove
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The real question is: Where do you focus your energy and your time? Wisdom from one of my faves @radicalselflove ...
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The real question is: Where do you focus your energy and your time? Wisdom from one of my faves @radicalselflove #createthelove The real question is: Where do you focus your energy and your time? Wisdom from one of my faves @radicalselflove #createthelove
Amen. No one wins, especially you. Don't hide your amazingness. #createthelove
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Amen. No one wins, especially you. Don't hide your amazingness. #createthelove Amen. No one wins, especially you. Don't hide your amazingness. #createthelove
If you’re used to running after people in love, or running from them, watch this. It’s time to change your relationship story. #createthelove #moustachewisdom If you’re used to running after people in love, or running from them, watch this. It’s time to change your relationship story. #createthelove #moustachewisdom
When we lose relationships it's kind of crazy what can happen... sometimes we'll miss people we ...
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When we lose relationships it's kind of crazy what can happen... sometimes we'll miss people we didn't even really want to be with! In these moments I think the reaction is because (1) losing love actually stimulates the same parts of our minds as where addiction engages... so there's that ... When we lose relationships it's kind of crazy what can happen... sometimes we'll miss people we didn't even really want to be with! In these moments I think the reaction is because (1) losing love actually stimulates the same parts of our minds as where addiction engages... so there's that 😮and (2) We face the unknown. So sometimes the fear in uncertainty makes us go back to what is certain... even if what is certain doesn't feeeeeeel good. Weird, right?! Well the human psyche is brilliant... make no mistakes.

If we're willing to pay attention and step back from our pain in the loss, we will begin to see just how brilliant of a teacher loss is. It provides us with so much information about what we may want more of... and also less of (which is really also teaching us what we want more of). It can also teach us how we could've shown up to life, ourselves and our relationship better... •
The other part that can be challenging to understand is that not everything we lose we're going to want back. Sometimes losing things is a gift. Sometimes when things are taken from us in many ways, we finally feel the weight we were carrying. This can cause guilt ("maybe I didn't love them enough?!"). But what's really happening is you're learning that perhaps you held on longer than you really wanted to?

Life unfolds exactly as it should. There are no mistakes... how do I know that? Because that's how things unfolded. Any other belief would have us needing to change what has happened, and we can't. So the best thing we can do is trust that this is all working for us (it always is... even if we can't see it... yet) and continue to grow and expand. That's what nature does... and since you're just a pile of cells and a bunch of a electrical stuff... how can you be any different? #createthelove
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This applies to every area of our lives... Not just relationships. Our ability to say "no" is one ...
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This applies to every area of our lives... Not just relationships. Our ability to say "no" is one of our greatest assets because it translates so much to the value we place on our time. It also shows how much we value and respect ourselves and our ability to honour our truth at the risk of hurting ... This applies to every area of our lives... Not just relationships. Our ability to say "no" is one of our greatest assets because it translates so much to the value we place on our time. It also shows how much we value and respect ourselves and our ability to honour our truth at the risk of hurting someone's feelings.

Why would you leave things open? Why go on a date with someone you don't want to? Why leave hope or an opening where you know there shouldn't be one? Quit living life half-assed. Quit leaving connections open that you don't want and dating people that give you a "hell-maybe". Wtf is with that?!

Why do we say "maybe" with our hearts?!? Why do we say "maybe” with our time?!? The reason this is so important is that the more you say "no" to the things you don't want and "yes" to the things you do want - the more you start believing in yourself. And more of the good stuff shows up.

YOU have to be ready to choose that. YOU have the large responsibility of choice. No one else is going to do it for you so if you want your life filled with "yes" you've got to turn your "maybes" into a clear "NO". #createthelove
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